86% are against tusks
If there is one indisputable reason that you must watch insecto-forensic, simian-slasher flick Phenomena, the 1985 film by Italian director Dario Argento, that reason is not
- because we learn that “It’s perfectly normal for insects to be slightly telepathic.”
- to appreciate how far Jennifer Connelly’s subtleties as an actor have progressed since she was 15-years-old
- because too few film soundtracks include Motörhead and Andy Sex Gang [sic]
- that you are looking for cinematic evidence that entomology is a soft science
- that you are looking for cinematic evidence that primatology is a soft science
- because you wish that more movies portrayed children with congenital facial disfigurement as terrifyingly psychotic
- that there are too few opportunities to enjoy a delightful evening swim in a cesspool of liquifying human remains
- that single-sex residential secondary-school educational pedagogy is a soft science
Though those are all worthy reasons. Truly.
No. Really the one reason to watch Phenomena is to behold perhaps the best t-shirt to have a walk-on role in a movie until Napoleon Dynamite.
And not only that, but this.
which I think means “86% are against tusks”.